Why You Must Detach Yourself Emotionally In Business

Filed Under Emotional Intelligence, Videos

Here’s a very important lesson that must be learnt in order for your business to really take off and for it to be everything you want it to be. Watch the short video first then read the article below.

A couple of days ago I woke up to one of those winter mornings where there wasn’t a cloud in the sky, not a breath of wind and there was a deep frost on the ground. Beautifully clear, crisp and still. My favourite type of day.

That was a good enough reason for me to go for a walk right there, however there was another reason, that would shortly present itself. When I turned my computer on, it confirmed that I had a problem, a problem that I had in fact had, by this time, for 4 days. One of my servers was down. Well, a server that one of my sites is hosted on. It was a site I have had running for about 2 years now called The Soccer Blog.

This was on Wednesday morning, the server had been now from the previous Saturday evening. So, that just confirmed the fact I was off for an early morning walk.

As I was walking and enjoying the beautiful morning I began to think about the server and I laughed at myself as I looked back about two and a half years to when I first started out online. Why? Well, because back then, my reaction to this server “problem” would have been oh so very different to now. Now I decided I was just going to go for a walk. Back in the early days, I would have been panicing, I would have been very anxious. Basically I would have been a complete nervous wreck and, most likely, I would have been taking it out on some poor unsuspecting person in a very unprofessional manner.

Since I have been online I have learned some very important skills. However, there aren’t too many more important, more fundamental than this lesson. Since those early days I have taught myself how to emotionally detach myself from the outcome of everything I do in my business. Let me just clarify that. I’m not saying that I don’t work hard, I don’t care about what I do and how I do it. I most definitely do. What I mean is, I no longer demand of myself that everything I do must be 100% perfect, must always work, that the prospect I am speaking to has to join me in my business etc. Do you see the difference?

When you are like that you demand too much of yourself, you are too emotionally involved and therefore you come over as being anxious, nervous and needy etc, because you are. You know, sometimes things just don’t go as you had hoped, sometimes people aren’t very nice on the phone, sometimes servers just crash.

Let’s take an example of you talking to that prospect on the phone whilst you are in the wrong state of mind. The prospect will sense it, they will pick up on it through what you are saying, how you say it. People do, and they are not very attrative traits. Why would anyone decide to join you? Answer is, they wouldn’t. Believe me!

You have to learn to step back, detach yourself emotionally from the outcome of that phone call (or whatever it is you are doing). You have to be at ease with yourself, you have to be you. If you let yourself get carried away with a situation, it is very easy to react in such a way that it will hurt the situation rather than help it. You lose out, no one else, just you.

I’m sure if you have been online for any lenght of time you will have heard the terms “attraction marketing” and “personal branding”. Well, I suppose “attraction marketing” is a little about what I’m talking about. I mean if you are still emotionally involved you are not going to be very attractive. But I think a better way of describing what I’m talking about is another term. This was recently coined by a good friend of mine and I think it hits the nail on the head! ”Authentic Marketing”!

That’s what you need to be, totally authentic. When you are relaxed and emotionally detached, that’s what you become, you become authentic. And when you are authentic you are you, you are natural. There’s no edge, there’s no anxiety etc, and that’s far more attractive. Don’t you agree? I hope so.

I hope you found this article and video helpful and if you have any questions or want to chat about this or anything in fact, please do get in touch. I’d love to hear from you.

All the best

Rik

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